Helping Your Teenager Manage School Related Stress

The school year has started, and while parents may be especially focused on their children’s grades, their teens may be stressing more about very different things, such as fitting into the social scene, dating, making the team, impending college decisions, and physical changes. Here are a few stress management tips for you.

Find time to connect with your children so that conversations are comfortable and often. Over time you’ll be able to understand what is on their mind, not only because something fresh and new has occurred, but also because you’ll be able to see patterns in what it is they talk about. It also lets them know that you support them now and will be there for them throughout the school year and beyond.

Take a look at the successes your children have had in the past, both socially and academically, and talk about those too. Triggering those memories will help them be at ease with current challenges and may help them identify those skills that they learned that can be utilized again.

Don’t wait until stress has reared its ugly head, leading to a major meltdown. Instead, take advantage of these calmer moments to check in and remind your teens about the importance of getting enough sleep, eating well, managing time wisely, and scheduling downtime each and every day to unwind and recharge while doing something fun, engrossing, and relaxing.

Make sure your teens, as well as the entire family, have a healthy and realistic daily routine. This will set up reasonably good expectations for each day, and help potentially stressful mornings run more smoothly. Be sure to allow your teens to have input here as this will reinforce the importance of time management, as well as be a show of respect for them, their ideas, and their needs.

Anticipate potential stressors and talk about them by asking open-ended questions such as “What are you looking forward to this year?” or “What are you feeling nervous about this semester?” You can help your teens work out solutions to anticipated stressors, think of ways to lessen this stress ahead of time, take a look at what did or did not work the previous year, and of course, talk again about healthy ways to manage stress. To have this conversation before the big test or project will make a big difference.

And just to repeat, make sure to build in regular, ongoing time for these conversations. Checking in regularly will reinforce for your teens that you are a source of support, you can nip potential problems in the bud, and you can revise or rework plans as needed.